Tuesday 02/09/08

The whole point of the entry, was to give you a conversation involving the aftermath of sending the link to this blog to that girl.

It all started when she revealed to me that she had been using to me to dish some hurt onto the male race. She says that men before me have treated her bad (she obviously doesn't know who I am) so she was seeing other guys as well as me. I instantly thought of this entry. It was the makings of a great conversation that could be so funny it would make ur penal area sticky and your nose bleed with excitememnt.

I wanted to create a spectrum. At one end she would feel very sorry and then I could throw her to the opposite end and make her very angry and see what colours would fly out of her aggresive mouth.

Unfortunately this didnt happen and what was foreseen was nowhere near what occured last night. At first she was very sorry for treating me like she did. I was a chorus of "How could you do this to me"s, "I thought you liked me"s and "I'm so hurt"s. This captured the first end of the spectrum nicely. She replied with a series of "sorry"s, "I never meant to hurt you"s and showering me with compliments like "your such a nice guy". Task 1 of 'Mission: Hilarious Break up" complete. I told her "I'm no fool, and think I waited around for you" This is when I sent her the link to this blog. She saw everything. I was expecting a few comments about how I'm such an asshole, you know ego-boosting things. But she just turned into some malicious little "Im-going-to-make-things-up-to-hurt-you" whore. Admittedly, I'm bullet proof and anything anyone says to me wouldn't ever bruise my ego one bit. But she still tried...and failed.

I planned to post the entire conversation from last night. But unfortunately, it goes against everything I stand for. It turned from me being an asshole and her falling for it, to her being very nasty and me returning her venom. This was neither funny or comfortable for me although I took the moral highground and won the fight.



However, the conversation continues this afternoon. And suffice to say I do not let you down completely. Here it is:



Girl: Im glad I saw the real you yesterday and I dont have 1 bit of guilt in me at the moment which makes me a whole lot happier. Thanks. I hope your proud of your "Alpha Male" status which by the way makes you sound like some sort of monkey. Your probably the least guyish top lad I know.
Bill: At least i'm not malicious. I might be an asshole, but theres a difference. I ain't a slag like you either.
Girl: But im not a slag. A slag is a girl who offra there body to a load of guys. Did I do that? Erm no.
Bill: You offered 6 guys a kiss in one night. You kiss with your mouth, your mouth is part of your body. Look, this wasn't most to get nasty. This was meant to be funny to read about. I didn't want to hurt you. But you started hissing your venom.
Girl: You didn't hurt me. Your probably the most horriblist guy ive been out with.
Bill: Thanks. I like that. Still went out with me though.
Girl: I only went out with you to see if I could pull off dating 2 guys at the same time.
Bill: Im glad that being a slag is a trophy for you. It isn't good for a girl to be known as a slag.
Girl: Well its been the first and last time for my experiments and they are over. I didn't enjoy it but for you being a male slag sounds like your life.
Bill: Guys can get away with being slags. Its unfair I know. But never mind.
Girl: Guys can get away with it but they are guys who dont end up with decent girls.
Bill: If i wanted to "end up" with someone. I wouldnt second for a second rate girl. Which is why I didnt stick with you
Girl: No you wont unless you completely change. You aint exactly got looks or personality going for you at the moment have you. Wheras me. Iv'e got personality, ambitions and model looks. So lets think about who really lost out on who.
Bill: Model looks? are you fucking serious? I mght not be good looking but I have personality. Thats how I pull and get girls numbers week in week out you fucking idiot. And seeing that you fancied me before even spoke to me proves that I must be attractive in some way. Now be a good girl and stop trying to get blood on your sword when all you have is a butter knife. Your just bitter that your intentions to play me went wrong
Girl: Well I do have a modelling contract so I must have some model looks. Your average looking but you pull because girls will think your a guy who dont know he's good looking because your not. You ain't a fit essex boy although you do try. Im not bitter i'm just honest and before I cared about your feelings so didnt want to be honest to you.
Bill: That doesn't make sense it even worth entertaining until you talk English. Come back when you stop talking shit.
Girl: Yes it does make sense your just too arrogant to take it in.
Bill: Your arguement is nil. I must have something going for me to be as succesful as I am with women including you. So stop talking shit and come back when you have a valid arguement mrs "model looks and ambition"
Girl:I'm dont. I cant be bothered with gus like you anymore, but hey at least you can be proud of yourself. Your officially the biggest wanker iv'e ever been out withm so go tell all your friends how succesful you've been.
Bill:I will do better. Im blogging this whole conversation as we speak. Check it tonight. Your a big aspiration. Do I have to pay you for a leading role?
Girl: Fuck off and tonight i'm not going to check your blog. Im going to the pub with Darren. I have time for people I like.
Bill: Thats a very poor last gasp effort to hurt me. Bill is bulletproof honey. Im not gonna say that I'm out with some girl tonight, because i'm not. But still. I win again.

The whole conversation proves that she is upset, and I didn't want to upset her. I'm not out to upset any one. Just have a good time. She is clearly bitter that her plan to play me failed because in fact, she was the one who was being played.

Which shows. Never mess with an alpha male.

I showed James this conversation. He commented accordingly.

James: I cant stop laughing at the model looks bit. Is she fucking stupid? She defines mediocre. If she was a colour she would be beige. Hopefully it will teach that incestuous whore that she shouldnt mess with an alpha male ever again. Welcome to zerosville. Population: Her.

Thankyou James.